February?! Already?!

I’m not sure how it happened but it’s February. 1/12 of 2010 is finished. The end of January brought the Official Layoff Announcement and I now have 57 (calendar, not work) days left at the Evil Corporate Job.

Last week was a lost cause due to a cold that knocked me flat. I have to admit that I may have not fought back as hard as I could have. Or as hard as I would have in other times. I started feeling a sore throat Tuesday night in the middle of the night. By Wednesday at choir I was using the Think Method more than actually singing. Thursday was a lousy day at the office and Friday was Work from Home Day.

By Friday I felt bad enough that Work from Home meant work from bed. And here is where the story begins to take a turn from the usual way this would unfold in my life. Knowing that I was sick, G proactively asked if he could bring over dinner and “anything else you need.” I gave him a list of cold medicines and he actually brought them all; it came to almost $50 because he bought the bigger boxes because he said he “didn’t know how long you’ll need this stuff.”

On Saturday, it was an effort to move from the bed to the couch and I spent the day snoozing on the couch, watching movies with DS2. I needed to get dog food by dinner time but just couldn’t make myself put on clothes and navigate the cold and snow to go get it. G told me NOT to go and that he would bring over dog food — and dinner again.

He also brought flowers.
— — —
A year ago (or longer) on This Journey…

I guess it’s really starting

I’m whining about my training schedule over here and here.

I know. I just started yesterday. Aren’t you glad I’m compartmentalizing?
— — —
A year ago (or longer) on This Journey…

Just when I start watching a little football…

…the Vikings choke. This is not really a surprise for those cynical folks in Minnesota. What’s surprising is when a team actually wins a championship. Not when they come from ahead to lose. Our common refrain is “Well, it was a good season.” or something like that. G and CS were over for the game yesterday and we had a low-key few hours.

Of course, you know that I don’t really care about sports. It’s an entertainment industry and I guess as such provides valuable jobs and keeps the economy moving, etc. etc. but I have a whole rant about how our society worships sports idols more than anything else we say we worship and more than is necessarily healthy for a society with so many other things that need our time and attention.

Anyway.

On Saturday G and I walked around MOA and window shopped for rings. The adventure had a bit of a rocky start when, instead of going to the mall where we could ease in to looking at rings and talk together about what we had before, he took me in to a stand alone jewelry store where we were immediately accosted by a sales person who started asking too many questions. What are you looking for? Men’s rings? Women’s rings? Engagement rings? Solitaires? How long have you been together? Are you engaged already? Do you want matching bands? AAAAAAGGH.

In the flurry of the inquisition G made a couple of comments that sent me just about over the edge and I just called an end to the whole thing and walked out of the store.

Sitting in the car in the parking lot with freezing rain falling I told him that I never wanted to hear him say “whatever she wants” about anything related to this wedding. I was a mess of conflicting emotions and thoughts and it was a pretty rough half hour or so.

Eventually we got to the place where we articulated to each other a couple of important points. It’s not about the “stuff” but a ring is an important symbol. I don’t need (or want) a huge “rock” that will spending a huge amount of money, but hearing that he didn’t want to spend the money on the price tags we had just glimpsed made me feel like I did with X – that I wasn’t worth the $ to him, that I was again going to be the main bread-winner and a whole host of other nasty thoughts of which I’m not proud.

After we walked past a few more stores and I began to see things I actually liked, and he saw that what I liked wasn’t thousands and thousands of dollars I think we both calmed down a little bit.

About that time we walked past a stationary store and I went in to look through the invitation catalogs while he used the restroom. Good. Grief! Invitations have changed in 26 years – and they haven’t gotten cheaper! As I continued my research on-line later that evening I found it ironic that it would be very easy to spend more on the invitations than on the wedding ring I buy him! Totally stupid, IMHO. So, now I’m researching alternatives.

Last night after the football game I started researching dresses. I don’t want a wedding dress. I’d like a nice, classy dress that I can wear again and again. The trick comes, of course, with the idea that as I begin training for a half marathon I am a much different size and shape than I will be in four months. But estimating that size and shape is tricky. And again, even with a “nice” or a vintage dress, I could easily spend more on it than on the wedding band he liked.

I’m back to thinking those folks who elope are on to something. Although I want my friends and family (well, some of them) around for this. Maybe PC – the administrator at church – had the right idea. They got married at Williams Pub on a Thursday night. Casual dress, Justice of the Peace, people that could come were there. P & D (her hubby) ordered a bunch of appetizers for the group and everyone bought their own beverages – and more food was available if people wanted it. Easy Peasy.

At the same time I’m thinking all these things, the phone rings and it’s G’s mom calling to see if he told me that she wanted to pay for the cake and wondering if “you considered appetizers or something else for people to eat” at the reception. Now, to her credit she clarified that she wanted to pay for all the food, not just the cake. But as I told G this morning, adding appetizers adds a level of complexity to the reception; you need people to serve or replenish platters, you need different and more dishes and clean-up is longer. Are they hot appetizers? Now you’re dealing with cooking. Cold? You need to deal with storage. Not that I would have to deal with all that, but someone would and it would increase the costs.

I guess I’m just at the over-whelmed stage just now.

One thing I can recommend is a site called wedsimple.com  A couple of friends have used it and the part I like the best is that it generates a ToDo list with appropriate due dates. So I know I’m fretting over things a little early. Helps a little bit to know that when I’m spinning with all this.

All this and transitioning out of Evil Corporate job (still no official date) means I’m piling Significant Life Change Stressors one upon the other. But knowing me, you wouldn’t expect anything less, would you?
— — —
A year ago (or longer) on This Journey…

Another project

For those keeping score at home, you may remember my big announcement about JH talking me in to training for the Grandma’s Half Marathon.

Well, turn about is fair play and I’ve talked her in to blogging about it.

Keep up with all the laughs over here: 2chicks13miles.wordpress.com
— — —
A year ago (or longer) on This Journey…

Jan 10 Sunday in Mazatlan

I slept great on the air mattress last night, but probably mostly because I used ear-plugs. G spent the night dozing and listening to the night sounds in SrK&J’s neighborhood. Apparently the parties start after midnight on Saturday night in Mexico too. Who knew?

We still slept in by dog-care standards. J had made caramel rolls for breakfast. And coffee. Praise Jesus.

We sat around talking over breakfast and around 9:30 we helped them move their old mattress and frame out to make room for the new bed they were getting from some friends that were moving back the US.

K and I walked the six blocks or so to their friends house while J & G drove their car. It’s warm here (yay!!) and I spent the morning walk with my hands swelling up. This happens at home too on the first few hot days. My body’s way of saying "Drink more water, would ya!"

After the moving of the beds we piled back in the car and drove over to the timeshare so we could maybe check in. It was our lucky day (ok. my lucky year, so far!) and the unit that belongs to JH was vacant and we could get in before the checking time of 4pm.

The condo is cozy but very nice. It’s right on the beach and all units are two floors. The living room/kitchen floor is the floor you enter on this level. Propping open the door and opening the window facing the ocean means you can get a beautiful cross breeze through the rooms. Downstairs is the bathroom and two bedrooms. Again, by opening the window facing the ocean (in the master bedroom) and the window facing the city (in the bedroom with two twin beds) and leaving the doors open a lovely cross breeze ventilates the room. No need for the AC even though some may have though tit was warm enough for it. As far as I’m concerned it’s a lovely change from -20F.

Errands are next.We hit up the Super Q where we had access to ATM, farmacia, lunch and groceries. Then SrK & J leave us for a bit of a siesta. I was completely content to shower and lay on the bed listening to the ocean. G was very happy to be able to see the Green Bay game. I did find it necessary to remind him that he didn’t have to have the sound up so high, since the announcers were shouting in Spanish. ;-)

Then to church with Sr K & J. Hey, I’m a church geek. I know. Plus they’re down here working for the church, so what are you going to do? It was very interesting anyway. Lots of singing (with out of tune guitars) lots of talking that I had to work pretty hard to understand but that’s my own fault for never having learned Spanish. But it was all good. I’m skipping too many details to really give it a good account. I was definately a cross-cultural experience that I want to process a bit.

Church started at 5 and ended around 7:30. And then there is the chatting. That seems to be universal. We still hadn’t eaten so we got to a retaurant after church around 8:15. The Mazatlan equivalent of Perkins is what Sr. K said, but I thought the food much better than that. And the bakery looked amazing. More like Wuolette’s meets the Longfellow Grill (Twin Cities’ references that will mean nothing to anyone that actually reads this!)

It’s just so good to be with Sr. K & J. It’s a little surreal, too.

We’re back at the condo now, the windows are open and the roar of the surf is filling the room. Almost overwhelming the TV news program. (btw – what in the world is going on up there in the North! Did they really show Alabama with Snow Drifts??!!)

It has been just a beautiful day spent with friends in a new place seeing new things and experiencing a new country. Can’t wait to see what tomorrow brings. 

Powered by Qumana

— — —
A year ago (or longer) on This Journey…

Jan 10 Sunday in Mazatlan

I slept great on the air mattress last night, but probably mostly because I used ear-plugs. G spent the night dozing and listening to the night sounds in SrK&J’s neighborhood. Apparently the parties start after midnight on Saturday night in Mexico too. Who knew?

We still slept in by dog-care standards. J had made caramel rolls for breakfast. And coffee. Praise Jesus.

We sat around talking over breakfast and around 9:30 we helped them move their old mattress and frame out to make room for the new bed they were getting from some friends that were moving back the US.

K and I walked the six blocks or so to their friends house while J & G drove their car. It’s warm here (yay!!) and I spent the morning walk with my hands swelling up. This happens at home too on the first few hot days. My body’s way of saying "Drink more water, would ya!"

After the moving of the beds we piled back in the car and drove over to the timeshare so we could maybe check in. It was our lucky day (ok. my lucky year, so far!) and the unit that belongs to JH was vacant and we could get in before the checking time of 4pm.

The condo is cozy but very nice. It’s right on the beach and all units are two floors. The living room/kitchen floor is the floor you enter on this level. Propping open the door and opening the window facing the ocean means you can get a beautiful cross breeze through the rooms. Downstairs is the bathroom and two bedrooms. Again, by opening the window facing the ocean (in the master bedroom) and the window facing the city (in the bedroom with two twin beds) and leaving the doors open a lovely cross breeze ventilates the room. No need for the AC even though some may have though tit was warm enough for it. As far as I’m concerned it’s a lovely change from -20F.

Errands are next.We hit up the Super Q where we had access to ATM, farmacia, lunch and groceries. Then SrK & J leave us for a bit of a siesta. I was completely content to shower and lay on the bed listening to the ocean. G was very happy to be able to see the Green Bay game. I did find it necessary to remind him that he didn’t have to have the sound up so high, since the announcers were shouting in Spanish. ;-)

Then to church with Sr K & J. Hey, I’m a church geek. I know. Plus they’re down here working for the church, so what are you going to do? It was very interesting anyway. Lots of singing (with out of tune guitars) lots of talking that I had to work pretty hard to understand but that’s my own fault for never having learned Spanish. But it was all good. I’m skipping too many details to really give it a good account. I was definately a cross-cultural experience that I want to process a bit.

Church started at 5 and ended around 7:30. And then there is the chatting. That seems to be universal. We still hadn’t eaten so we got to a retaurant after church around 8:15. The Mazatlan equivalent of Perkins is what Sr. K said, but I thought the food much better than that. And the bakery looked amazing. More like Wuolette’s meets the Longfellow Grill (Twin Cities’ references that will mean nothing to anyone that actually reads this!)

It’s just so good to be with Sr. K & J. It’s a little surreal, too.

We’re back at the condo now, the windows are open and the roar of the surf is filling the room. Almost overwhelming the TV news program. (btw – what in the world is going on up there in the North! Did they really show Alabama with Snow Drifts??!!)

It has been just a beautiful day spent with friends in a new place seeing new things and experiencing a new country. Can’t wait to see what tomorrow brings. 

Powered by Qumana

— — —
A year ago (or longer) on This Journey…

Grateful: Extra Edition

This is a bonus week for blessings, friends.

Not only did G ask me to marry him on Sunday, but I also received a job offer yesterday!

And tomorrow? I get to be warm again. In Mexico on a vacation for a week.

I’m bringing the laptop with me with the intent to post pics and reflect here on various topics.

But I’m not making any promises about frequency. Or quality.

peace out.
— — —
A year ago (or longer) on This Journey…

sucker

I called my mom last Sunday to tell her the news about G. She monopolized the conversation to the point where the boys came in the house before I’d had a chance to tell her. Since I didn’t want the boys to hear the news by overhearing me telling her I rang off.

I talked with my sister on Tuesday and told her. She was congratulatory and offered to help with event planning or driving down to get DS1 if we pick a weekend before he’s done with school. Not overly effusive but on the familiar side of polite.

My mom and sister work together at my mother’s tax service office. So they talk frequently. Some might say the situation is enmeshed, but I might be overstating it. (I’m not.) I specifically told sis that I had not been able to tell mom and that she was free to tell her when she spoke with her that evening.

By 2:30 this afternoon I still had not heard a peep from my mom. So I called her. I couldn’t connect with either her or my sister at any of the six different phone numbers I have for them all afternoon. I left casual, light sounding voicemails. “Hi! Just wondering how things are going with the bed delivery and wanted to touch base one more time before I left for Mexico. Hope things are going ok. please give me a call.”

Nothing.

At 8:30 pm I called my mom again. I had completely forgotten that they were attending a tax seminar today.

I did my best to not be passive-aggressive: “Have you talked with Sis?”

“Yes, I’ve talked with her. We were at the seminar together all day today. I understand you don’t have a date yet.”

“No we are checking the kids’ calendars before we decide on a date. I expected I would have heard from you. Or maybe you don’t approve?” I dared to challenge her.

“Oh sweetie. I don’t remember if she told me yesterday or today.” And then she launched into an explanation of the computer troubles they had at the office yesterday, how she can’t afford to buy new computers but might be able to upgrade the computers if that would fix it; and the trouble she’s having getting her new bed delivered and then today she has been up since 5:30 in the morning because of the dogs and then spent the whole day at the seminar today, and now, she’s in bed at 9:15 at night because she thinks she’s coming down with a cold.

Translation: me and my news are not important enough to her to make the gargantuan effort to call and say “Congratulations! I’m so happy for you.”

And you wonder why I’m an overachiever.
— — —
A year ago (or longer) on This Journey…

Epiphany 2010: or getting engaged sort of messes with your exercise routine

Not that I have a routine yet. I do have new running shoes as of yesterday (thanks to Beth at The Running Room on Hennepin Ave for putting up with me!!) I didn’t get to try them out today because my card key didn’t work on the building’s gym door.

And it’s all the talking on the phone.

If I was really smart I guess I’d take my cell phone to the gym and talk while walking but I’m a big fan of the “heavy breather” routine on a cell phone.

It has been really great to talk with so many people who are so happy for us (and thanks to all y’all here too!)

A couple of FAQs:

Where’s the jewelry? Don’t have any yet. There’s talk (and time) and when it comes down to it I’m not much of a jewelry person anyway so I’m a little stumped about what I would “pick.” Mostly it gets in my way but after a couple of days now I’m leaning toward thinking a “lil’ sumpin’” would be OK

Do you have a date? Not yet. Trying to gather calendar information for DS1 and DS2 and G’s kids/family not to mention a few friends who Cannot Be Absent.

Are you going to change your name? Probably not but again, haven’t talked about it yet. I figure I spent 22 years with my father’s name and 25 years (my entire adult life/career) with X’s name. Do I really want to spend the next 25 years with yet a different name?

Where are you going to live? This we have talked about. DS2 still has two years of high school left so G will be moving in to my house. No big rush to sell his and the process of what moves over and what doesn’t will take some time. Although that could all change if J2 & M find work here in the cities and want to take over his place. We’d have to move much quicker to clean it out and get it ready for them.

Were you surprised? Yup. Obviously we’d been talking about “it” but I had no idea that Sunday was the day.

On another happy note: 3 more sleeps until we’re in Mexico visiting Sr.K (and enjoying an 70/80 degree improvement in the weather!!!)

Blessings and light, my friends.
— — —
A year ago (or longer) on This Journey…

Grateful: 2010 1st edition

Welcome to the new decade! My intention is to continue my pattern of counting a few of my blessings in Sunday posts. So here is a list of a few of the things I’m grateful for this week:

  • Extra PTO that required me to work only one (1) day this past week. While I’d like to think that I would have a pristine house I’m happier to report that I used the time to chillax more than obsess about cleaning.
  • Low-key new year’s eve with G which included a neck massage to relieve a lingering migraine
  • Great cooking (chicken chili and salmon were a couple of highlights
  • Ending the old year by playing music with S and B
  • G made a point of talking with the boys on Friday about his “intentions”
  • Starting the new year by going to the movies and dinner with the boys and G on new year’s day (we saw Sherlock Holmes since Avatar was sold out)
  • Walking on Jan 2 to kick off my marathon training
  • All the support (and laughter) from friends here (and in person) who hear I’m going to run a half marathon
  • Taking time to read a novel (“U is for Undertow” – I heart Kinsey Millhone!)
  • A great interview/audition for a potential new church music job
  • Serving as assisting minister this week at church
  • G popped the question this morning after church (fwiw, I said yes!)

— — —
A year ago (or longer) on This Journey…

Welcome!

Welcome to the new (and hopefully permanent) home of This Journey. It's good to have people walking along, especially during the bumpy parts. I can be contacted at not.fainthearted at gmail dot com. Or leave a comment!

Subscribe

Just you wait....

  • DS1 Spring Break: in 31 days, 0 hours
  • Current Best Guess of Last Day at Evil Corporate Job: in 52 days, 0 hours
  • Easter: in 54 days, 0 hours
  • DS1 Finishes Freshman Year: in 87 days, 17 hours
  • Wedding (!): in 103 days, 1 hour

Recent Comments

Recent Posts

Calendar

February 2010
S M T W T F S
« Jan    
 123456
78910111213
14151617181920
21222324252627
28  

Act Out

Actually know IRL

Actually need to meet

Blogroll

Earthy Links

food

Life Relationships & Musings

Saturday Photo Scavenger

Technology

Meta

archives

Archives

Of Interest, at least to me

What I’m reading:

I need a suggestion!!!

Stuff I'll probably not finish...but who knows
Alexander Hamilton by Ron Chernow

The End of America: Letter of Warning to a Young Patriot by Naomi Wolf

Finished Reads 2008

Hard Laughter by Anne Lamott

Neither Wolf Nor Dop by Kent Nerburn

Bird by Bird by Anne Lamott

Traveling Mercies by Anne Lamott

Lamb by Christopher Moore

T is for Trespass by Sue Grafton

Ambler Warning by Robert Ludlum

The Mist by Stephen King - because I need a trashy novel when I 'm sick, that's why!

The Dark Tower - Dark Tower VII by Stephen King.

What’s on my needles

Girl's Best Friend Anklet Socks in Maroon Knitpicks Essentials

All Content is Covered

Creative Commons License
This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Share Alike 3.0 United States License

If you believe I have infringed on your copyrights, please comment on the post and I will work with you to resolve the situation.