Well, I finished a conversation with the Sr Pastor. Things are more ‘up in the air’ than I thought they’d be by now. He didn’t really have any decisive conversations while I was gone. That means that we’ll have to get one big conversation scheduled this week because he leaves for vacation on Saturday and doesn’t come back until Aug 19….which is too late to start something if I’m really going to do the choir.

I’m trying to strike a balance between patience and passivity. I can’t be passive. It’s not in me. But too often assertiveness and wanting decisions to move forward appears as impatience and I’ve been burned by that brand too many times. Things take time, sometimes; but they don’t happen by themselves. I’m not a very laissez-faire type person. Perhaps you’ve noticed?

So maybe nothing gets decided here and I spend September (or longer?) looking for an internship somewhere else.

Uncertainty can wear on a person.

All I can do is take one step, one hour, one decision, one day at a time; but I’d like to have it all figured out. I’d like to be able to start imagining what my life and schedule will look like for the next year or so; fitting the pieces together in my mind, preparing for the emotional and physical energy it will require; planning out time (and activities) for self-care.

I don’t like driving 70 miles an hour into a fog bank, but that’s what it feels like. I’d rather drive 80 mph clearly.
— — —
A year ago (or longer) on This Journey…

TGIF - I think 2008
flirting and the use of email 2007
day 2 without boys 2006

— — —
A year ago (or longer) on This Journey…

TGIF - I think 2008
flirting and the use of email 2007
day 2 without boys 2006

— — —
A year ago (or longer) on This Journey…

TGIF - I think 2008
flirting and the use of email 2007
day 2 without boys 2006

Posted on August 8th, 2007 under my crazy life. RSS 2.0 feed. Leave a response, or trackback.