and well, men.

Yesterday morning I played for church again. At the beginning of the summer I figured these would be my “Last Hurrah” Sundays so I scheduled myself to play prelude, offertory and postlude. Yesterday would have been the last band Sunday…if the band had shown up that is. As it was it was KE on flute and me and AB on piano.

SB has returned and we are overlapping a couple of weeks while she ramps up to take back her job of Music Director…so she led the psalm.

Anyway…Mr. Hockey had been asking to hear me play and he’d been mentioning that he’d like to go to church with me. So I told him I was playing and invited him to drive down for the service. And he did!

I introduced him to a few people, as is polite when you’re standing there talking to an obvious visitor and someone comes up to ask you, a staff member, a question.

I went and sat next to him during the sermon and took communion with him. Probably some people noticed. Oh well. If they want to know, they’ll have to ask.

We went out for lunch afterwards. I felt bad because I wanted to take him to Barley John’s Brew Pub, but it’s closed on Sundays so we ended up at an Applebee’s (UGGGH) but it really was the company and not the food.

I was probably a little different than he’s ever seen me. I really need a nap after church on Sundays and yesterday was no exception. The usual amount of adrenaline for playing added to the adrenaline for him being there and I was wiped out by the time we hit the booth.

We talked afterwards and made plans for Thursday night when we have tickets to the Guthrie. It will be the second time (counting yesterday) that he will have driven into the city. So far, I’ve been heading up to the country, or we’ve been meeting in-between in the suburbs. A new step that he’s going to be driving in. And a commitment from him in a way because he works 45 minutes on the other side of his place from me…so to get to see me on a weeknight in the city where I live will require a lot of driving on his part. We’ll see how it works out.

He does come down to the cities for some things already. Apparently he has Gopher Hockey tickets…has since 1989 or so. And he asked if I’d go to a game with him. So, the Big 10 hockey season starts in what, October? November? Almost sounds like long term plans!

(I just looked up the Gopher Hockey Schedule. Doesn’t really start until the end of October and goes through MARCH! Uh, yeah. I think I remember hearing something about March Madness…Ok. Well. I have to say, this is giving me pause only because X was such a sports freak. At least Mr. Hockey doesn’t stop mid-kiss when the sports come on TV, like X used to….well, not so far, anyway.)

Although he still hasn’t broached the subject of visitation schedules with his X (right now we have our children on opposite weekends, so it’s impossible to have a weekend date…except when my boys were still on vacation. Apparently, he renegotiates schedules every school year and he suggested that he could adjust the weekend he has his children so we could see each other on the weekends. We’ll see what happens.)

Home at 2:00. Power nap for an hour and a bit while the boys watched the baseball game (the Twin’s pitcher had 17 strike-outs?) Left the house at 3:30 for the jazz jam benefit.

Crap! I haven’t played jazz, with lead charts like those since high school. And that was 27 years ago!! And when it comes down to it, I’ve never played jazz with lead charts with a “combo” on my accordion. So it was a very new experience. The dad of the girl who had the brain surgery played too, and he plays tuba…so it was “unusual” orchestration already. And he’s a legit player too. The other guys blew me away. The guitar player was fabulous. Really knew his stuff. We had 2 different bass players. The upright bass player was buddy of the guitar player and they really grooved together. Three different trumpet players, and McKilt on sax.

Oh, and GolfPro showed up because his tournament got canceled by the rain. So there we are. Me and my boys sitting in an old-world Irish pub in south Minneapolis and I’m trying to be part of the rhythm section for a combo that includes McKilt while GolfPro watches. Surreal sandwich, anyone?
I might have felt a little better if we had played a little less Miles Davis, Thelonious Monk, Charlie Mingus and some other be-bop great I can’t think of right now.

I squeezed off my solo (teacher’s arrangement of “That’s All”) while the guitar and bass player were packing up to go to their paid gig at 6:00.

Chatted with McKilt and GolfPro while the neighbors of the Girl with Brain Surgery played Bolivian flute music. And then actually sat in and played the last hour when it was just Electric Bass Boy, Tuba, Trumpet player from the pub (who has awesome chops), Me and McKilt. Hardest set of my life.

Home by 9 with more music tumbling around in my head than I’ve had in a really long time. Everything from the Lully I played for postlude to the Monk tune we didn’t really suck to0 bad on.

As for the men part.

Well, the truth of the matter is that McKilt is settling in comfortably to the platonic side of things.

It’s a lot easier when there’s someone like Mr. Hockey around who wants to see me, actually calls to chat, actually sends emails, actually kisses me. It’s easier when I’m learning things about him that I like. And learning little quirks that right now I can smile about. Basically, this has actual potential because it’s real and not all in my own head.

The part I worry a little bit about is that neither McKilt nor GolfPro know about Mr. Hockey. And if I’m reading this whole thing wrong and McKilt thinks I’m hanging around waiting for him, he’s going to be hurt to find out I’m not.

I know! I know! I know! I’m not in control of his reaction to that. And if he has feelings or glimmers of feelings or intentions of feelings he has a responsibility to talk to me about them and not just assume things. He’s a grown person and I’m not in charge (even remotely) of protecting him. But I still feel bad when a friend gets hurt; and I feel worse if I have some part in it…even if there’s nothing I could have done to prevent it.

It’s a grey day. Perfect for sitting around with a hot-water bottle on your crampy self and mulling these wonders over in your mind. But it’s also Monday and I have a list as long as my arm. So I better get crackin’
— — —
A year ago (or longer) on This Journey…

odd dream 2008
dear anonymous 2007

— — —
A year ago (or longer) on This Journey…

odd dream 2008
dear anonymous 2007

— — —
A year ago (or longer) on This Journey…

odd dream 2008
dear anonymous 2007

Posted on August 20th, 2007 under my crazy life. RSS 2.0 feed. Leave a response, or trackback.