Thorny Thursday
As nice as the weekend was, I’ve discovered that what I thought was becoming firm ground is a lot more boggy than I thought. And also that there seems to be a luggage cart required to navigate it.
Mr. Hockey is being “forced” to go back into mediation regarding some parenting time issues (she wants him to give up some of his designated time during spring break in which he wanted to take the kids on a trip. There’s obviously more, but that’s it in a nutshell. I didn’t want to look back at this and wonder if it was that he wanted less time. It’s actually that he’d like more time but at least doesn’t want to give up any he has.)
Wrangling over this would be stressful to anyone. The problem comes when he openly admits that it colors his general feelings toward all women.
A couple of things have been written to me this week that smart a little bit. It’s hard to have this kind of conversation through email and is generally a mistake to do so. But it hasn’t been possible to talk in person and the phone calls have been missed or not returned.
I’ve also learned that I may have been over-reaching in where we are. Which also smarts a little.
We’re seeing each other tonight. It’s my birthday present night. Dinner and the Guthrie. I have to confess that I’m a little saddened that this cloud has come over this week. There’s nothing I could have done about it, but the fact that it’s completely out of my control makes me frustrated.
I’m frustrated that she can still have this effect on his mood. And I’m frustrated that that has an effect on my relationship with him that I do not have any control over. The fact that he knows that she torques him off and still lets it color how he feels about the new woman in his life is what we call “baggage.”
It’s not like I didn’t think he had any. I’ve seen this already. I just didn’t know it was as big a piece of luggage as it seems to be.
I know I can’t unpack it for him, but geezalou I wish he’d take a few bricks out.
— — —
A year ago (or longer) on This Journey…
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Mazatlan at Christmas 2006
JV player of the year 2005
i luv the flu 2005
— — —
A year ago (or longer) on This Journey…
-
Mazatlan at Christmas 2006
JV player of the year 2005
i luv the flu 2005
— — —
A year ago (or longer) on This Journey…
-
Mazatlan at Christmas 2006
JV player of the year 2005
i luv the flu 2005
October 26th, 2007 at 2:19 am
AW, I feel for you. Mind you, I picked up on a wee thing you said and thought I might comment, if I may: if something is out of your control then you just have to shrug, flick a switch inside your head and decide not to allow yourself to be frustrated. I do this. I will only allow myself to be frustrated with myself, my performance or things I can influence or have some control over. I don’t for example get frustrated with world peace.
This kinda ties in with my idea that you never get 100 per cent bad or good; you always (in my humble opinion) get a mixture, and often it is up to you to choose how you view the event.
For example, I saw a photograph of myself taken years ago and I looked happy and healthy — but checking a personal diary I see that I was stressed and had also hit my thumb with a hammer. You would never have known from the picture. My wedding day was fabulous, and I loved it and enjoyed it — but on the other hand there were people in the background who tried to ruin everything. One day I may forget the bad so only the good remains, or else I can have the wisdom to know that it is up to me to be aware of the bad, but not allow it to spoil the good.
Your birthday is like that. Please don’t let things spoil the good bits of your life! Especially when they are out of your control. That’s my thruppence worth!
October 26th, 2007 at 12:58 pm
I hate it when people take one incident or person and let that cloud everything else.
I also think it’s weird that he thinks you’re overreaching when he has already said all of those things to you too.
If I’ve said it once, I’ve said it a million times. I will never understand men.