The One Where I Wonder If I’m “Getting Better At It”

Note: This is a back-dated post. Written on the day but not published. Too much to do during that Assembly and not enough time to really reflect and edit appropriately. Not that I always do anyway. I’m publishing it because I want to mark where I start to notice what I think is a significant change in how I’m handling conflict and group dynamics.

Today’s business meeting was extremely contentious and upsetting for some of the people in the room. For my part, I was interested in watching my own reaction. Namely, feeling very comfortable and centered in observing them get worked up but not getting hooked into it myself. I did not experience my usual reaction of tension and clenching and spinning my mental wheels trying to figure out a way to get everyone happy.

I didn’t understand how some people got to “betrayed and angry.” I understood that they were, but I didn’t (and still don’t) get how they got there.

That level of detachment was at a new level for me. I liked it. One way to explain it might be that I just trust that this is all going to be OK. That’s a rather faith-filled point-of-view I suppose. Another way to look at it is that I trust the process. Another is that I think I’ve finally got enough experience to know that those that were feeling “betrayed” were acting out of fear and would feel that way no matter what happened. Something about where they are “at” required them to feel and express that emotion. It really had no basis in reality. There was no collusion, no betrayal or back-room dealing. No conspiracy.

There was lack of clear communication and lack of strategy.

Maybe that’s somewhere I can help in the future?
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A year ago (or longer) on This Journey…

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A year ago (or longer) on This Journey…

— — —
A year ago (or longer) on This Journey…

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11/18/08 Note: In preparation for being away from the computer for a while, I've turned off comment moderation because I want you to be able to interact with my guest posters. Be good while I'm gone kids!

Welcome to the new (and hopefully permanent) home of This Journey. It's good to have people walking along, especially during the bumpy parts. I can be contacted at not.fainthearted at gmail dot com. Or leave a comment!



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